These two songs struck me this week, the first a few days ago, and the second just this morning as I finished making breakfast. Interpret them as you will, but for my heart, they scream the grace of God at me.
"Good God, if your song leaves our lips,
If your work leaves our hands,
Then we will be wonderers and vagabonds.
They will stare and see how empty we are.
How the freedom we had turned us up as dead men.
Let us be cold, make us weak
Let us, because we all have ears
Let us, because we all have eyes, good God
How they knew that this would happen,
We're so run down.
Good God! Can you still get us home...
How can we still get home?
I'm not dreaming.
We're forgetting our forgiveness." Underoath
.....
"All the time you were burning my letters, you were only acting the part.
You think without me, you'll get on much better, but you don't even know your own heart.
Come home, darling, come home quickly.
Come home, darling, all is forgiven, so come home quickly.
I treated you as if you were a princess; you treated me like a cop.
I gave you boundaries to save you from certain death, dangling from the end of your rope.
Come home, darling, come home quickly.
Come home, darling, all is forgiven, so come home quickly.
But you're still playing for a love you'll never find, outside of these arms of mine.
The whole town is one step behind you, with the hangman on call.
They've got the judge and you're convicted without a plea.
Darling,
They will listen to me." Pedro the Lion
.....
God has been melting my face off with his forgiveness today. I hope this reminds you, even a glimpse, of his grace.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Angels.
Wow. So, so much has happened since my last update. You would think doing a school up in the Rocky Mountains, 45 minutes away from civilization, would allow for copious amounts of free time.....
nope.
Not so much.
Our first week's teaching was about responding to God, taught by a lovely lady named Donna McGowen, and this last week was about prophetic evangelism by Greg DeVries. Both weeks were incredibly paradigm-shifting, to say the least. God has been tearing down some walls around my heart that I didn't even know were there, which is painful, but necessary. He's been showing me that I've spent so much time pouring into others that I've forgotten about my own gaping wounds. I've always been the strong one, the encourager, regardless of what context that has been, and the whole time He's been screaming at my spirit that I can't be strong in this season if I want my heart to change. It's definately a time of brokenness and vulnerability, which I hate, but am embracing at the same time.
In addition to class time Monday through Friday, we have book reports every few weeks, worship three times a week, a quarter-long project on the Native American people which will culminate in a 24/7 prayer room for the YWAM Denver base, work duties (mine: making breakfast for the base....5:30 am is glorious), and weekly outreaches to the Denver community....
and the list goes on.
I am also an intercession leader with a group of the DTS students (the primary school YWAM offers), in which we are praying for Cambodia these next 3 months, which is totally amazing to be able to stand in the gap for these countries that are needing radical change.
It's all incredibly exciting, but as I said, busy. Through all of it, God has been reminding me that yes, he is calling me to be a leader at some point (whatever that will look like) but with that comes more responsiblity! So I'm embracing the craziness with open arms and an open mind.
Add that to my attempt to learn Norwegian in my free time, and I've promised about 10 crocheted hats, mittens, or scarves to fellow students....
Our school will also be traveling to New Orleans, Louisiana mid February for Mardis Gras street ministry. I was a bit apprehensive at first, because typical "evangelism" has always rubbed me the wrong way....you know, those who you see holding up signs that proclaim "You need Jesus or you will burn in hell", etc. But I know that isn't what God has for us....He has people with hurting hearts he wants us to reach out to, in whatever way he leads us . But I can guarentee it won't be with a megaphone and tracts. :D
Something I am incredibly excited about: Albania! We will be doing an outreach there for 5 weeks in April-May, with the focus being on anti-human trafficking efforts there. For those who don't know specifics on the global problem of human trafficking, I strongly encourage you to go to http://www.love146.org/ . God has been ripping my heart to shreds about the issue, and I know I can't sit idly by when I have the opportunity to go to a country and influence people first-hand. We will be training in Albanian towns on human trafficking, volunteering at victim safehouses, speaking and bringing encouragement to Albanian churches, training of law enforcement on human trafficking, as well as practical projects around the cities we visit. The cost is $2,700 for the 5 weeks . I know I am supposed to go, and that God will totally provide. So many of you gave for my tuition for the school, but I'm asking you pray about possibly giving towards this as well. Full payment is due March 2nd. By helping me out on this, you are directly feeding into a ministry that will influence women and children who have literally been sold as property.
If you feel led to give, please send to:
Bethany Roth
c/o YWAM, WISE 2009
12750 W. 63rd Ave.
Arvada, CO 80004
(please make checks out to Youth With a Mission)
Now, on to how amazing God is and how he intervened in my life last night. The highway up to the mountain base is a very curvy 45 minutes of driving. After an amazing meal of Indian food in Arvada, everyone else but 4 of us stayed in the city for the weekend, and we came back up the mountain in our 15-passenger van...I wouldn't recommend that to anyone when the road is icy and you have no weight in your backseat...
Long long story short, we came about a foot or two from sliding off the road down a deep drop-off. I don't think I've prayed so hard in a situation like that before. Coming from South Dakota, as so many of you know, weather is fickle there and anything can happen, so I've been in situations similar, but in cars, not 15-passenger vans. There was no doubt that there were angels holding our van and all the other cars there until a rather swell fellow came and towed us with his truck. Besides not being able to feel my toes and fingers, everyone was fine, but there was no way that we should've stayed on the road. Thank you, Abba.
The really funny part of the whole situation was about 1 minute before, no joke, we were praying that God would break us, that he would increase our trust and melt our hearts. Well, be careful what you pray for, because my trust is certainly through the roof today! God truly has a sense of humor sometimes....but in all seriousness, God was looking out for us, and I am grateful beyond measure.
I will try to update this at least weekly so you can all stay updated on a consistent basis.
Please be praying for me and the other students in our school, that we would be open and vulnerable to what God wants to do during this time. I also need the money for outreach; pray that people would respond if God lays it on their hearts to give.
Thank you for who you are, and how all of you have impacted my life. Until next time I see you, know you are all in my prayers and that I love you!
nope.
Not so much.
Our first week's teaching was about responding to God, taught by a lovely lady named Donna McGowen, and this last week was about prophetic evangelism by Greg DeVries. Both weeks were incredibly paradigm-shifting, to say the least. God has been tearing down some walls around my heart that I didn't even know were there, which is painful, but necessary. He's been showing me that I've spent so much time pouring into others that I've forgotten about my own gaping wounds. I've always been the strong one, the encourager, regardless of what context that has been, and the whole time He's been screaming at my spirit that I can't be strong in this season if I want my heart to change. It's definately a time of brokenness and vulnerability, which I hate, but am embracing at the same time.
In addition to class time Monday through Friday, we have book reports every few weeks, worship three times a week, a quarter-long project on the Native American people which will culminate in a 24/7 prayer room for the YWAM Denver base, work duties (mine: making breakfast for the base....5:30 am is glorious), and weekly outreaches to the Denver community....
and the list goes on.
I am also an intercession leader with a group of the DTS students (the primary school YWAM offers), in which we are praying for Cambodia these next 3 months, which is totally amazing to be able to stand in the gap for these countries that are needing radical change.
It's all incredibly exciting, but as I said, busy. Through all of it, God has been reminding me that yes, he is calling me to be a leader at some point (whatever that will look like) but with that comes more responsiblity! So I'm embracing the craziness with open arms and an open mind.
Add that to my attempt to learn Norwegian in my free time, and I've promised about 10 crocheted hats, mittens, or scarves to fellow students....
Our school will also be traveling to New Orleans, Louisiana mid February for Mardis Gras street ministry. I was a bit apprehensive at first, because typical "evangelism" has always rubbed me the wrong way....you know, those who you see holding up signs that proclaim "You need Jesus or you will burn in hell", etc. But I know that isn't what God has for us....He has people with hurting hearts he wants us to reach out to, in whatever way he leads us . But I can guarentee it won't be with a megaphone and tracts. :D
Something I am incredibly excited about: Albania! We will be doing an outreach there for 5 weeks in April-May, with the focus being on anti-human trafficking efforts there. For those who don't know specifics on the global problem of human trafficking, I strongly encourage you to go to http://www.love146.org/ . God has been ripping my heart to shreds about the issue, and I know I can't sit idly by when I have the opportunity to go to a country and influence people first-hand. We will be training in Albanian towns on human trafficking, volunteering at victim safehouses, speaking and bringing encouragement to Albanian churches, training of law enforcement on human trafficking, as well as practical projects around the cities we visit. The cost is $2,700 for the 5 weeks . I know I am supposed to go, and that God will totally provide. So many of you gave for my tuition for the school, but I'm asking you pray about possibly giving towards this as well. Full payment is due March 2nd. By helping me out on this, you are directly feeding into a ministry that will influence women and children who have literally been sold as property.
If you feel led to give, please send to:
Bethany Roth
c/o YWAM, WISE 2009
12750 W. 63rd Ave.
Arvada, CO 80004
(please make checks out to Youth With a Mission)
Now, on to how amazing God is and how he intervened in my life last night. The highway up to the mountain base is a very curvy 45 minutes of driving. After an amazing meal of Indian food in Arvada, everyone else but 4 of us stayed in the city for the weekend, and we came back up the mountain in our 15-passenger van...I wouldn't recommend that to anyone when the road is icy and you have no weight in your backseat...
Long long story short, we came about a foot or two from sliding off the road down a deep drop-off. I don't think I've prayed so hard in a situation like that before. Coming from South Dakota, as so many of you know, weather is fickle there and anything can happen, so I've been in situations similar, but in cars, not 15-passenger vans. There was no doubt that there were angels holding our van and all the other cars there until a rather swell fellow came and towed us with his truck. Besides not being able to feel my toes and fingers, everyone was fine, but there was no way that we should've stayed on the road. Thank you, Abba.
The really funny part of the whole situation was about 1 minute before, no joke, we were praying that God would break us, that he would increase our trust and melt our hearts. Well, be careful what you pray for, because my trust is certainly through the roof today! God truly has a sense of humor sometimes....but in all seriousness, God was looking out for us, and I am grateful beyond measure.
I will try to update this at least weekly so you can all stay updated on a consistent basis.
Please be praying for me and the other students in our school, that we would be open and vulnerable to what God wants to do during this time. I also need the money for outreach; pray that people would respond if God lays it on their hearts to give.
Thank you for who you are, and how all of you have impacted my life. Until next time I see you, know you are all in my prayers and that I love you!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Colorado
It's Monday and I've been here in the Rocky Mountains for a week, and I must say it's rather fantastic. The majority of the 3 months will be spent up in the mountains: no cell phone, no city, lots of snow and trees. Marvelous. I don't have heaps of time at the moment but I wanted to give everyone a quick update, just so you know that I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. :D
There are about 100 of us here at the Eagle Rock base, and Monday is supposed to be our laundry/down in the city day, but it's been snowing all night and doesn't look like it's letting up anytime soon, so it's all up in the air.
God is so faithful, by the way. I just found out that I have more than enough money for the tuition for my schooling, not that I'm surprised but it still puts a smile on my face. All praise to him!
He's also been showing me that this season is going to be a time of rebuilding. I'm so sick of so many attitudes, prejudices, and even just some belief systems I find myself reverting back to and I know that this is going to strip me of all of that. I'm excited to see what tomorrow holds, and everday. I'll write more later when I get the chance. Until then, I pray God will melt your face off with his blessings today. :D
Love you all.
There are about 100 of us here at the Eagle Rock base, and Monday is supposed to be our laundry/down in the city day, but it's been snowing all night and doesn't look like it's letting up anytime soon, so it's all up in the air.
God is so faithful, by the way. I just found out that I have more than enough money for the tuition for my schooling, not that I'm surprised but it still puts a smile on my face. All praise to him!
He's also been showing me that this season is going to be a time of rebuilding. I'm so sick of so many attitudes, prejudices, and even just some belief systems I find myself reverting back to and I know that this is going to strip me of all of that. I'm excited to see what tomorrow holds, and everday. I'll write more later when I get the chance. Until then, I pray God will melt your face off with his blessings today. :D
Love you all.
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